One Weird Life Hack: Connect First, Fix Later

by Lynn Brewer  Dec 12, 2015
One Weird Life Hack: Connect First, Fix Later

Earlier this year, I not only married my best friend, we also started a business together. It’s been amazing, difficult, at times obnoxious, and at other times pure bliss. Working together with my new husband in the startup phase of OneTaste Denver means we are constantly learning about each other, how to work with one another, where our boundaries are as well as where they should be. But in the first six months of marriage and business partnership, there’s one weird thing we’ve found that helps us.

It happens in those moments when nothing is going right — when sales are down, no one we are calling or emailing or texting will respond to us, nothing is working (from technology to business strategy), and one of the cats has probably just vomited on the rug. My mind immediately shifts into high gear of how to fix all our problems.

But instead of doing any one of those things, or even jotting them down in a to-do list, I ask for an OM from my husband. He gently strokes my clitoris for fifteen minutes in a prescribed manner, and our only goal is to feel the sensation that arises. In doing this, we connect on a level that no amount of couples therapy or business coaching can parallel. We increase the intimacy between us, our capacity for putting our attention out, and our bond between us. We connect first, and fix whatever problem we’re facing later.

By doing this, we can tackle our obstacles from a clearer and more connected place. It may not be a united front, but we stay connected no matter what. And whatever challenge we’re facing doesn’t seem so insurmountable anymore. Even if the cat threw up on the rug.

(Lynn's post was originally published on The OM Scribe.)

(Photo Credit: ZenPanda)