Your Best Stress Relief Comes Between The Sheets, Not In a Pill

by OneTaste Living Library  Feb 24, 2014
Woman doing yoga

Originally posted by Fitarella, written by Jacqueline Carly.

I have no idea why this one doesn’t stick with people better, but it’s true: sex is a great cure for stress and anxiety.

In a world where we look to prescriptions, support groups, and yoga (not that I’m knocking yoga, I LOVE me some yoga!) for all our stress relief, sometimes it’s just as easy as getting your sexy on and hittin’ it. And I’ll tell you this: I know that you THINK about sex a lot. It’s only human. But what I bet happens is that you think, I’m too __ for sex right now. You can replace that blank with:

  • tired
  • mad
  • in pain
  • broke
  • busy

Look at that list. Are your excuses on it or not? And I’ve been waiting for this one, so let me get it out there to get it off your mind:


Though it’s often a lot of fun to have sex with other people, you’ve got hands, or maybe you’ve got other methods. But I’m pretty sure that you have the ability to get off in some form or fashion, whether or not you want someone else to be part of the fun.


Your body does some amazing things after you find your way to the big O. Out comes prolactin, which gets your mind off sex (at least for a few minutes). You get a nice dose of oxytocin, which gives you a kind of general warm, happy, I just wanna cuddle feeling. You also get a nice shot of endorphins, which give you pain relief as well as a kind of energetic rush. Interestingly, there’s another chemical released called vasopressin, which some scientists think is what turns us from hunters into nesters when it comes to sex and sex partners. (I should say that some other studies show that some people don’t produce much vasopressin, and thus don’t get that same urge.)

What a great mix of potential ways you can feel:

  • your mind gets off sex, so you can focus for a bit.
  • you feel comfy and want to hug (or take a nap).
  • you get a bit of pain relief and energy.
  • you feel a little less like hunting out mates for a bit.


There are lots of reasons. One is that we are upset or less than enchanted with our significant other. She/he’s stuck you with the kids too many nights in a row for work. She/he seems to have no idea what you do all day. Whatever. Want to know a secret? Sex doesn’t fix everything (let’s not be crazy here) but it certainly makes for a reasonable pause of all the cruddy emotions and history built up between you. And again, look at those four rewards up top.

My favorite excuse is when people tell me they’re too busy for sex. These same people have two hours for lunch, or an extra hour after work for shopping, or they watch three hours of TV a night. TV, just so you know, doesn’t give you any of the four chemical rewards above. None. Zip.

Lots of people talk about a waning sex drive. Though there are plenty of chemical reasons why this happens as life goes on, and some require some medical attention, a good many of these issues are also related to imagination (we get lazy) and practice (yes, I’m giving you permission to practice getting off more).


You deserve more orgasms. They will help with a lot of what you’re worrying about. They will give you a nice boost of great chemicals to clear up and calm your head. And, uh, you know. It’s sex. It’s fun!