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Have You Ever Been in Love?

Jan 29, 2014
When I was 27, after having been in several relationships, I found myself asking the question, “Have you ever been in love?” I was beginning to worry I would never experience this feeling. I had some feelings for some girls in those relationships, but I knew there was more possible. After …

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What TurnedON Women Want in Bed

Jan 28, 2014
Kelly Marceau recently wrote this awesome article What Sexy-Consciously Awake Women Want SEXUALLY From MEN. She is referring to what we would call a 'TurnedON Woman.' And, we couldn't agree more with her bold and dead on statements about the "more" that's possible in sex! Here is a …

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Mothers and OM

Jan 24, 2014
And then there are the women who say to me, “oh no, I can’t put attention on my orgasm because I am a mother.” and the litany of reasons that follow from I don’t have time to I want to protect them from that. Until, frankly, I just want to scream. I want to scream, “how dare you use your child in …

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Fixing the White Knight Complex

Jan 23, 2014
We talk a lot in this work about the benefits of turning women on vs. fixing (healing, reforming, the list goes on) them. Fixing being a derivative of the pervasive, disempowering broken-winged bird —> white knight complex I have found myself ensnared in a few times in my life. Learning how to …

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Heroism? Sure, I'm game.

Jan 21, 2014
(Confidential to those who know me personally: I wrote this a year ago this week. --Ken) A woman invites a man to be a hero. And he says, Sure, yeah, I'm totally up for it. He's completely unaware that the hero's journey he's embarking on is genuine, and treacherous; and that the obstacles to …

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All Of Your Very Important "Issues" Are Just Tumescence

Jan 20, 2014
When I first got what tumescence was, understood it in my bones, saw all the ways I was trying to "manage" it and how that was like trying to put an octopus to bed - I complained, or I defended my viewpoints, I talked just to talk, I cried (quite a bit), I had such hard sex that not …

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Masculine and Feminine

Jan 19, 2014
Out in the world, there's this idea that the Masculine's right role is to lead, and the Feminine's is to follow. That's not true but I can tell you how it comes to look that way. Yes, the Masculine thrives in the leadership role. But he's an equally great follower. Truth is, the Masculine does …

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Sugar Vs. Desire

Jan 18, 2014
Today I realized that sugar—without shame, without sabotage, with full naming of desire—is the one and only thing that I allow myself to have. That my ADDICTION to sugar is rooted in my aversion to my real …

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Ask Ken

Jan 18, 2014
Q: I've never really been able to last long in sex without coming but recently in the last 6 months or so it's actually been worse. Its putting stress on my relationship with my girlfriend. I was wondering if you had any suggestions? A: Here's my thought and my experience on the subject. First …

Go ahead and release your fears

Become What You're Afraid Of

Jan 17, 2014
Kristi Stout wrote a beautiful piece for Rebelle Society entitled '10 Wicked Morsels For Living A Sexy Life,' that includes some bold and enticing philosophies for life, such as: "Whatever you’re afraid of, or hesitant to become because you think you can’t. Become it. Rawly. Fiercly. …