Relationships with diminishing returns
by OneTaste Living Library Jul 6, 2011
It’s happened to all of us. Sex that was great at the start of the relationship turns ho-hum over time.
It’s not your fault, you tell yourself. It’s kind of a given, right? The spark just can’t stay lit once familiarity has set in. Life/kids/walking the dog gets in the way. Sex is expected to bring diminishing returns. Thank god that’s just not true.
The answer is orgasm. The real kind. If you’re not having sex that increases in sensation and intimacy and enjoyment, you’re not getting everything you should be getting out of your orgasm.
You’re not alone. We’re taught to use orgasm as a short-term pleasure fix. A return to a state of comfort and calm. A way to let off some steam.
If you want to see accelerating returns from your orgasm, you have to do something different.
You have to cultivate orgasm as a practice. Find a way to get completely lost in it, to let your self-consciousness fall away. It’s what Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (try saying that three times fast) talks about in his book Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience. You have to take sex from simple pleasure to the optimal experience of enjoyment.
That’s why you have to OM. It’s a simple, structured way to lose yourself in orgasm on a regular basis. Soon what you experience in OM overflows into your regular sex life, too. Sex gets incrementally richer, deeper, more satisfying, and more sensational as time passes.nnTurn your diminishing returns into accelerated returns. OM is the way.
What do you think? Have you experienced incrementally more satisfying sex?