black and white drawing daemon farrah lawrence

My Daemon Awakens

Jul 22, 2016
It's almost four years now since I began practicing Orgasmic Meditation (OM). Before OM, I lived isolated and suppressed. My OM practice opened me to make a major admission -- that I had a hunger for connected, deep, conscious, regular sex. As I started to open my sex, a pocket of a force inside …

man in dark tunnel maja topcagic

Hardy Boys: The Case of America’s Missing Man

Jul 21, 2016
I’ve been crying on and off for the past 5 days. By the grace of God and some of the most important men and women in my life, I was shown exactly how deficient I’ve been in my man duties. I’ve written some interesting things over the last couple years. Writing about getting fired, and learning …

screaming suffocating woman oly mcavoy

Safe to Be Me - Part 1

Jun 27, 2016
There is an ongoing discovery… that it truly is safe to be me, however it is that “me” shows up in the moment. This discovery repeats itself, over and over, as my embodiment journey reveals full variations of aliveness. This aliveness that shows up through/in/as me is sometimes experienced as …

psychedelic hair color woman dancing

Loving a Woman Through Her Jealousy

Jun 21, 2016
The first time I tried Orgasmic Meditation, I partnered with a man who was in his twenties, just a few years older than me. He said he had a girlfriend, but that they had a unique kind of relationship because she worked with people quite intimately as an actress. I asked probingly if she was OK …

two people face to face sensual

Beyond Gender - Unlocking Your Whole Human

Jun 20, 2016
The Tarot is a fairly elegant examination of life. It starts with the Fool card, which represents endless possibility. Then the deck splits into masculine and feminine all the way down to the last card, which is the World card. It is the highest, most evolved card because it represents the union …

synchrodogs people face down in a green field

Rapidly Changing Reality - And How to Thrive In It

May 23, 2016
Last week I took a trip to Romania. My first wanderlust-driven trip in nine months, the longest gap I’ve had between adventures in years. I’ve become accustomed to calling my vacations adventures. Vacations are uneventful, adventures are memorable. It is rare, indeed, that I come back without a …

Man and woman in bed

The Antidote to Trauma is Pleasure

May 20, 2016
I once read in a New York Times article, “being human is a traumatic experience.” My definition of trauma is having experiences that are more pressure or speed than the psyche has the capacity to open for. If I throw a ball without completing the throw, all the energy that was supposed to go to …

Pouring tea

In Love With Loving Out

May 13, 2016
Lately, I'm hooked on this idea of love out. Have you heard of love out? Woohoo! Love Out! It all started, 20 or so years ago, with this idea that I was hungry. My background, you may know, included a path to being a Buddhist nun. I had the idea that there was something that I needed to get, …

Woman with bright light on her face

Strength Training For Holding the Weight of My Own Desire

Apr 26, 2016
Last March while traveling in Turkey, I found myself on a date (as one does) with a tour guide I met during my visit to the Aya Sofya in Istanbul. As we were playing the requisite Get To Know You Q&A while walking across the Galata Bridge, I found myself telling him about my Olympic …

Man with gym shorts and shirt over head

Real Men Learn From Women (And This is How)

Mar 25, 2016
Men, it's true. Women want us to become better men and they want to help us. It has taken me a year in this practice to realize and accept this. I used to take adjustments and be thinking, "Oh I fucked up and did something wrong, the woman didn't like what I was doing and now she is never …